California officials today were pleased to announce that the first shovel ready jobs will now be created in California four years after the Stimulus Package was passed. “It’s taken awhile for the jobs to show up but we’re glad they’re finally here” said Governor Jerry Brown. The jobs will be involved in creating a new landfill to bury the hundreds of defective solar panels from the now bankrupt Solyndra manufacturing facility in Fremont. Governor Brown also noted that these jobs are in reality “green jobs, even though most people might not see it that way at first”. Later in the day, Al Gore tweeted ”This is just further proof that the future of job creation in this country lay in Green Energy”.
Filed under al gore, bill maher, California, dennis miller, Governor Brown, green industry, humor, jerry brown, jon stewart, onion, politcal satire, political humor, satire, stimulus, Stimulus Package, the onion, Uncategorized
California officials announced last night that Joseph Glabish, the last middle class citizen in California, died last Sunday marking the end of an era for the Golden State. The family has arranged for his burial to be in Arizona so that he might be near other former middle class Californians; however, the funeral will not take place for at least three months. California’ tax agents estimate this will be the amount of time required to search his body and his estate for every last penny they can find. Governor Brown has ordered flags to hang at half-mast today, and in honor of Mr. Glabish’s passing, the California legislature also passed a 20% pay raise for all government workers.
Filed under California, dennis miller, Governor Brown, humor, jerry brown, jon stewart, onion, politcal satire, political humor, satire, taxes, the onion, Uncategorized